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Crimes of Faith Alec gave the dead bird at his feet a desultory kick, sending a small swarm of flies into orbit. A few feathers fell from its already sparse plumage. A small sign, handwritten on a torn piece of cardboard, was tied to the bird’s limp neck. "GOD LOVER", it proclaimed in red lettering. Alec took a step back to escape the miasma of decay rising from the carcase. "I don’t get it," he said. "Why would somebody dump a dead turkey on my doorstep?" Alec sensed his wife Emily tense beside him as Officer Mathers picked at a pimple on his chin. "I’ve seen this before," Mathers said. "It’s the time of year. Apparently, Christians used to celebrate some significant day in December with feasting and gift-giving. Turkey was a traditional dish." "I don’t think this turkey’s exactly fit for human consumption," said Alex. "And anyway, what’s that got to do with us?" "Whoever delivered this must think you’re Christians. They take faith crimes very seriously around here, you know. We caught a Muslim family with a prayer mat stashed under their living room floorboards, and while they were in custody awaiting trial, their house burnt down." Mathers fixed Alec with what he presumed was the officer’s attempt at a steely-eyed glare. "Have you given anyone reason to suspect you of a faith crime?" Emily stepped forward, her hands clenched at her side. "Of course not! We’re decent, tax-paying, law-abiding atheists, just like you. Whoever did this," she said, waving at the turkey and wrinkling her nose in disgust, "is the real criminal. They’re probably Christians themselves, and are just trying to deflect suspicion onto someone else. Why else would they know so much about forbidden rituals? You should be out there right now tracking down those animals." Alec put a restraining hand on her shoulder. "Please excuse my wife," he said. "She’s been shaken quite badly by this, and we’re both worried that next time it could be something worse than rotting poultry." "Oh, I don’t think anything else will come of this. If my suspicions are correct, then the perpetrator’s bark is worse than his bite. Not that I can prove anything, of course," Mathers said, glancing at Emily, "so it’s unlikely I’ll be able to press charges, but I’ll have a quiet word with a few people and put a stop to it." He took a business card from his pocket and handed it to Alec with a yellow-toothed smile. "If you have any further problems in the meantime, here’s my direct line." "Thank you, officer," said Alec. He gave Mathers a steely-eyed glare of his own. "I sincerely hope I won’t need this." ¤ ¤ ¤ "I still can’t believe it," Emily said, shedding garments as she paced up and down the bedroom late that evening. "Why on earth would someone think we were Christians?" "You know how paranoid these small-town people can be of outsiders," said Alex. "Once we introduce ourselves properly and show them we’re not toting crucifixes or swigging holy water, this will all blow over." Emily scowled. "Just let me get my hands on whoever dumped that maggoty thing on my doorstep and I’ll show them just how un-Christian I am." Alec laughed and drew her into his embrace, his chin resting on the top of her head. "Did you know you’re cute when you’re angry?" Emily pouted and thumped him lightly in the chest. He glanced at his watch. "We’d better hurry up, he said. "It’s almost time." Quickly they finished undressing, put on floor-length dark hooded robes, and descended the stairs into the basement. He fumbled in the dark for a moment until he found the packet of matches in a concealed pocket in his robe. As he struck a match and touched it to the first of a line of candles, a shriek came from the far side of the room. Ignoring the noise, he continued down the line until he had lit all thirteen. He picked up a hunting knife with an ornately carved bone handle. The shrieks became louder, competing with the sound of steel scraping against steel as he sharpened the blade. "Honey, could you do something about that noise?" he said to Emily. "I have to concentrate on getting the measurements on this pentagram right." "Sure thing, sweetheart." Emily took a candle in each hand and entered the shadows of the basement. The shrieks were coming from a bound, gagged and naked teenaged girl who was tied spread eagled to a large stone-topped table. Her small breasts quivered as she struggled fruitlessly to free herself, her short auburn hair slicked close to her scalp with sweat. She stared imploringly as Emily positioned the candles at either side of the girl’s head. Emily wrapped her fingers around the girl’s windpipe, smiling over her shoulder at Alec as the girl’s scream became a barely audible gurgle. "After the day we’ve had, this is just the therapy I need." "You’ve got to admit," said Alec, "it is pretty funny. Fancy someone suspecting us of faith crimes." |
